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Dating in Early Sobriety

As we all know, dating isn’t easy – especially when sobriety is added into the equation.  There are the intense emotions and feelings, as well as the inevitable ups and downs of a relationship – all of which can be a recipe for relapse.  But just because you’re looking for love doesn’t mean your recovery has to take a backseat.  

Here’s what you can do to avoid jeopardizing your sobriety after jumping back into the dating pool:

Put You First

The thing about getting into a relationship in early sobriety is that all too often it can quickly become your focal point, when the focus really needs to be on yourself.  After all, recovery is about rediscovering who you are and taking the time to cultivate the most important relationship: the one with yourself.  Putting you first, then, ensures that you get to a good place within, which will ultimately lead you down a path to finding a better partner and landing in a healthy and functional relationship.  

Avoid Those Who Use

As a newly sober person, the last thing you need is to be around unnecessary temptation.  In fact, studies show that being around a partner who uses regularly increases the risk for the other to use, as well.  Instead, look for someone whose priorities don’t involve drugs or alcohol.  Being around someone who has similar long-term goals will not only encourage you to develop healthy, sober activities, but it will also motivate you to stay successful in your recovery.  

Take Your Time

A common rule of thumb is to abstain from dating the first year of sobriety.  This is because substance abuse warps how you see yourself, leaving you with no idea of who you are once drugs and alcohol are taken out of the picture.  Without that sense of identity, then, it’s nearly impossible to form balanced, healthy connections with other people.  By taking the time to work on yourself instead of jumping right into a relationship to fill a void, you’re more apt to find someone who’s a good match – one who enhances your life, not subtracts from it.  After all, you don’t need someone else to make you whole – through hard work and dedication that can be accomplished solely by you.   

Looking to re-discover who you are without drugs and alcohol?  Arise Recovery Center can help, providing intensive outpatient and aftercare treatment in two Texas locations:  Southlake and Fort Worth.  To learn more about our drug treatment facilities and the life-changing programs we offer, please contact us at 1-888-DFW-ARISE (1-888-339-2747) or by email at [email protected]